Say Anything
by Dr.Iceheart
Summary: A song on the radio, lead Korsak and Jane to a talk about love, and when he find out that she had never told her best friend that she loves her and Jane is forced to confess that she can't because "love" is not enough to express her feelings for the doctor, he start to encourage Jane to take a risk and confess her love to Maura. Based on the song "Say Anything" by Anderson East.
1. Chapter 1

**Say Anything**

**Disclaimer: Jane and Maura don't belong to me. I don't own anything. You can ask my parents.**

**A/N:**** As the summary says, this is based on "Say anything" by Anderson East and Jill Andrews because everytime I hear this song I can't help but think of rizzles. So I made this thing. And I really hope that you like the thing and that let me know what you think, just try to be gentle**** if you are going to criticize. Also, english it's not my first language so it there's some mistake, I apologize in advance.**

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><p>They were coming back from interrogate a suspect. Korsak was driving very slowly to Jane dismay. They had an argument before but Korsak just throw his rank at her and now she was sitting at the passenger seat. They didn't have anything to talk about so Korsak just put up the volume of the radio.<p>

The soft voice of Jill Andrews and Anderson East singing "Say anything" came through the sound system of the car.

Jane wasn't really paying attention to the music. She was thinking about how much paperwork she needs to do before going home.

Korsak on the other hand begun to tap the steer wheel at the rhythm of the song, paying special attention to the lyrics while driving them back to the precinct. He was actually intrigued about the lyrics. Clearly something important needs to be said and by the sound of it, it was a romantic song. Maybe the guy wanted to propose with the song? He keeps listening, until the very end of the song.

_And I can't wait another day to say the words that I always wanted to say_

Here it comes…

_And Darling, I pray for you to feel the same way_

Come on…

_All I want to say is_

Is…..

_I love you_

"What? That was it?" He made a face, not believing what he was hearing. He puffed saying "Kids these days."

Jane looked at him surprise at his outburst. Nothing had happened on the road. There were no kids. Right?

"What's wrong with you, Korsak?" she asked almost laughing at the expression on the face of the old detective.

"This song it's unbelievable!" So this was about a song? _Really?_

"Sorry, I wasn't paying that much attention. What's wrong with the song? It seems pretty nice to me."

"Are you serious? Did you hear the lyrics?" He asked without understanding why Jane didn't saw his point.

"Uhhh.. No?" She knew was she was getting into by asking that. Probably Korsak would start to rant about the lyrics and how the songs the kids listen these days are mostly about sex and drugs and cars and blah blah blah.

"This guy spend all the song basically saying that he has something important to say and the girl encouraged him to tell her and he says that he just hope that she feels the same," he was so frustrated.

"Uh so?" Jane really didn't see what the point was. The lyric didn't sound that bad.

"So, he spends the all song preparing her and at the end all he wanted to say was that he loves her! Can you believe it?"

Korsak look at her with his eyes wide open. Jane couldn't suppress the laugh at the expression and the ridiculous argument.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," she said, trying to control her face, "for some reason this may be a problem with you because…"

"Because apparently he was in a relationship with her and he had to go through all that trouble to just tell her that he loves her? You don't suppose to throw all that just to tell _that_ to someone!"

Jane couldn't believe it, they were really discussing a song?

"What's wrong with it? Maybe he wasn't ready to tell her before. Maybe he was waiting for the perfect time. Or maybe he thought that he may lose her if he confesses his love." _What?_

"The perfect time? Are you kidding me? There's no such a thing as 'the perfect time'! You got to tell the people you care about that you love them while you still can." Korsak said. "What if, for some reason, he didn't saw her again? Life change in an instant and you got to tell them the importants thing while they can still hear you. Had you ever thought about it?" She looked at Jane with a questioning expression on his face.

Of course she has thought about it. She had thought about it many years ago when she came home after her partner's funeral. And several weeks after that. She kept thinking about how she didn't told him enough how great he was. A great partner. A fantastic friend. She thought about how he never told him how much she loves him. Still she didn't do anything about it. She thought he knew.

"Jane?" Korsak said again, waiting for an answer.

She was lost in her thought and was caught off guard at her ex partner question. "Huh?"

He noticed that Jane was in another world. And he knew in who she thinking about. He was thinking the same.

After the longest car drive according to Jane, they arrived at the precinct (_finally_) and while Korsak parked on the front of the building, Jane was praying internally for him to stop this conversation. Love wasn't really her favorite topic. What was the point of loving someone if you couldn't be with her? _Her._

As they were ready to get out of the car Korsak couldn't help but notice the change in Jane's face. It wasn't a face of regret or grieve or memories for what she was thinking. It was a face of… love. So at some point something change and they weren't thinking about the same person anymore.

He saw it as the perfect time to push some strings. He knew in who she was thinking about this time, too. He could see it in her eyes. She had this special look that was reserved for just one person. He knew her well enough to recognize it. But he also knew that talking about it was like walking on thin ice.

Jane started walking faster to the cafeteria thinking that if she hurried enough, with all the people around them, he would finally drop the topic.

There was no such luck. Korsak started to walk faster trying to catch her pace. "If you never see someone you truly care anymore, wouldn't you like them to know how much you care? How much you love them?" He told her almost out of breath.

_Damn. I tried_. "Uh... Yes, I guess..." Just as they were reaching a table, her mother approached them. "I mean, I tell my Ma that I love her all the time." It was a desperate try to change the destiny of the conversation that she sensed he was trying to guide and she was desperately trying to avoid.

"Yes you do, because she is always persistent to remind it too." He looked at Angela's direction with an apologetic look and ordered just a coffee for him and Jane, hoping for she to left them alone so he could continue, "But what about other people?"

In perfect timing, the distinctive clicks of someone's heels could be heard entering the other end of the cafeteria and walking to them, "Oh! Just in time!"

She gave him a dead look in the eyes that he masterly avoided. He was used to it anyway.

"Doctor Isles, for example."

_Please don't._ The dead look hadn't worked and she was now almost pleading with her eyes. Unfortunately, that didn't work either.

"What about me?" Maura said cheerfully looking between the Sergeant and her friend as she aproached their table, trying to decipher the expression on Jane's face.

"Would you like to sit with us for a little while?" Korsak asked completely ignoring Jane's glare.

"Of course sergeant, what's wrong?" she answered while she moved a stool a little closer to Jane and sat between the two detectives.

"Nothing particularly wrong, we were just talking about love." Says Korsak nonchalantly.

"Really?" She said raising a perfect eyebrow at Jane's direction, receiving a nod. "Love it's one of my favorite reactions!"

"Oh god. Here it comes." Jane said softly with a hand on her forehead as her friend started to recall the scientific facts about love.

"Actually it's a conjunction of more than one chemical reaction. People often associate it with the heart and I've never really understood why, the process actually occur in the brain due to the action of endorphins-"

"Maura," first try.

"- and other neurotransmitters like phenylethylamine-". No luck.

"Maura," tried Jane again a little louder.

"- dopamine and-" It wasn't working. Maura was too engrossed in her little world full of science and fascinating things and-

"MAURA!"

"-Norepinephrine." Maura finished in a much lower tone of voice just to finish the idea. _Finally._

Korsak watched the scene unfolded in front of him with great amusement as all the cops on the cafeteria turned to look at them after Jane's outburst.

Jane rubbed her eyes, sighed and explained, "We weren't talking about the love as a reaction. The old man here, was talking about it as a feeling."

Almost perplexed, Maura just stood there staring at her best friend. Her best friend who absolutely hates the word _feelings_, hates to feel them, express them and even more talk about them, was talking about the strongest of all.. with Korsak?

_Wait. What love has to do with me? Did Jane told him something? About... me? It can't be, can it? _

She felt like hours had passed before she spoke again, "There's something you want to tell me? Last time we talked two hours ago you weren't in love with anyone". Jane just groan and tried to hide her face behind her hands. Wouldn't be great if the earth could just magically open and eat her?

Jane opened her mouth to respond, but before a word came out of her mouth Korsak was talking again, "No, not the _in love _kind of love. Just.. love. And how important it's to say the people you care about that you love them while you still can."

Maura was still confused. They weren't working on a passionate murder or something like that and she didn't understand the point of the topic, "May I ask where all this conversation is coming from?"

"Just a song that we heard on the radio"

"Oh"

"Korsak is worried and all frustrated because 'kids these days don't express their feelings'" said Jane, mocking him.

"Hey don't laugh! It's true. When I was growing up, if you loved someone you just told them, that way you could start a healthy relationship without hiding anything and saving you the trouble to write a whole song just to tell them that, because, let's be honest, he wasn't saying anything else about how he felt."

"Yeah, you just 'tell them', that's why you were married 3 times. So sure of your feelings."

"You are missing the point here"

"Which is…"

"Be honest with the people about your feelings!"

Maura was still a little confused and looking back and forth between the detectives. "I thought you weren't talking about a romantic relationship."

"We are not!" said Korsak getting more and more frustrated with the time. He needed accelerate this, "You for example, how often Miss I-don't-like-to-express-my-feelings here has told you that she loves you?"

"Korsak," tried to say Jane as a warning.

"I…" Maura was trying to think about it.

Korsak noted the thoughtful expression of her face and decide to help her, "let me rephrase it, how many times Jane has say it to you. Just give me a number."

Maura's face didn't change. She just kept thinking but couldn't remember. She couldn't lie without breaking into hives but she did what she did best: deflect, "I.. Jane has her own ways to express her feelings," At the suggestive face that Korsak did she clarified, "I mean I know that she cares about me by the way she acts and protects me and all that kind of stuff."

"Hey, Jane is right here!"

Korsak just ignored her and continued questioning the doctor, "We all know how she is, but that's not what I asked," he said almost with a playful tone. He knew he had caught her. He has the feeling that, unlike to everyone else, maybe Jane was a real softie when it came to Maura, "How many times has she directly told you that she loves you?"

"Uhh.." _Think, Maura, think._

Jane look at her expecting to hear what the doctor was going to say, although she already knew the answer.

"None," she finally said with a whisper and her head down. Korsak wasn't sure he had heard correctly.

"What?"

Maura raised her head and repeated a little louder this time, "None."

Jane just closed her eyes and sighed. She couldn't see the disappointed in Maura's hazel eyes even though her friend hadn't turned her head in her direction to look at her.

"Not even once?" asked Korsak again, he just couldn't believe it.

She looked down and shook her head. "Excuse me. I… I have to go"

"Maura don't-" Jane tried to say but the doctor just raised her hand as she walked away as fast as she could from the café.

"Oh man" says Korsak, with his eyes closed, trying to digest what had just happened.

"See what you did?" asked him a very angry Jane.

"What _**I**_ did? Are you kidding me?" and again some of the cops that were around turn to look at them. It was quite a show. Jane had to admit that she wasn't expecting an outburst like that. He tried to continue in a much calmer voice, "That woman right there has been your best friend for years! YEARS! She is the person that has sat right by your side every single time that you've been stupid enough to hurt yourself. Every. Single. Time. She wouldn't even stand up to go eat something or change of clothes, your mother had to bring her a change of clothes every day until you woke up. She is the only one that was capable to put up with you when you were being a jerk to everyone. She has been with you all the time. And I've seen how you treated her sometimes, but I've always thought that it was just something between the two of you. Like some kind of joke. That's just how you are. But this? I mean.. You've been friends for years and you have never told her you love her? You, more than anyone, know how important is for her to feel loved, and you failed her. I mean.. I'm sorry, I knew that sometimes you could be kind of stupid, but I didn't know you could be THIS much stupid."

And with that he stood up and left the café as well, leaving a very stunned Jane sitting with her mouth agape open in an empty table.

What had just happened? Did Korsak really told her all that? Korsak? She had never seen him so pissed in all the years that she knew him. What was his business anyway? She knew that she had never told her best friend how she felt, how much she appreciate her and every day she thought of a new way of saying it. But she had found other ways of telling Maura that she cares for her. She actually did it everyday by remembering her to put on her seatbelt or asking her to text when she got home late at night to let her know that she is safe, or just dropping by at the morgue at lunch time with a salad when they were working on a hard case because she knew that Maura wouldn't leave until she had a lead or something for them. That was _her _way of telling 'I love you', but actually saying the words? No. She couldn't. She couldn't just say it in a way when she actually wanted it to mean another completely different thing. Well not that much different, just… more. _God, so much more_. But she couldn't risk it. She just couldn't lose her.

Jane was so deep in her thoughts that she didn't listened her mother approaching her until the older woman put a hand on her shoulder, making her jump. She turned her head to look at her mother, still with her mouth open.

"I'm sorry sweetheart I didn't mean to scare you. But I just couldn't help but overhear what just happened."

Jane just closed her eyes and took a deep breath, "ma, not you too. Please."

Angela raised her hands in surrender, "I just wanted to tell you that I love you and I know that you love her too. I don't know why are you making such a big deal of telling her just that, but that's up to you. Just… honey, Korsak's right. Sometimes there's no other next time, there's not a second chance, sometimes is now or never. I'm not trying to be dramatic," Jane looked at her and tilted her head rising her eyebrows as saying 'really?', "I'm really not, baby. I'm just trying to open your eyes. They are just three words, but that three words could mean so much to her."

Jane closed her eyes again. Should she tell her mother why she just couldn't do it? She could use some advice after all. But.. her mother?

"Ma," she took a deep breath again and looked at her mother in the eyes, "I just can't tell her. They are not just three words to me. I.." She paused to reconsider _what _was about to say and to _who_ she was about to say it.

Too late. Her phone decided that exact moment to ring.

"Rizzoli," She answered it with a sigh, "okay, I'm on my way." Saved by the bell.

"Ma I have to go." She said standing up.

"I know baby. Just think about it. We'll find another time to talk." _Or not._

"I will. Thanks Ma, I love you." She said giving Angela a kiss on the cheek.

"I know that too," she answered while Jane stood up and started walking out. "And I also know you love her, too," Jane was able to hear just before she exit the café.

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><p><strong>AN 2:** **So that's the thing. I hope you enjoy it and if you like it I appreciate if you could take a second and let me know to see if I should continue this or not :)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Say Anything **

**Chapter 2**

**A/N: First of all, thank you to all of you who took interest in this story, especially to those who took the time and left a review for me to continue this. Secondly, I'm sorry that this update took so long, I tried to revise every paragraph to make sure I didn't made -many- mistakes. I tried. I already wrote the third chapter so the next update shouldn't take that long. Anyway, I hope you like this.**

**Disclaimer: Jane and Maura and all the characters from the show that might be mentioned in here don't belong to me. I own nothing.**

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><p>By the time Jane got to the crime scene, Maura was already on her knees next to the body with Korsak standing right beside her while Frankie looked around searching for anything that the killer could've left behind.<p>

She came closer to the body without taking her eyes from her best friend. Damn, _why did she have to look so beautiful today?_ The sun reflected in her honey blonde hair and from where Jane was standing she could see her beautiful profile, the perfect angle of her nose, the way her eyes closed a little, her brows narrowed and her lips moved slightly to the side. This was Maura Isles on pure concentration.

Jane just stood there staring at her mouth because '_how can you not? Have you seen those lips? Their perfect color, their shape and the way they move so seductively when she talks and-'_

Korsak cleared his throat when he noticed that Jane hadn't even asked him about the body yet. She shook her head lightly trying to focus and walked to stand at the other side of the body, opposite to Maura. Bad idea. Maura had decided to use one of those ridiculous tight dresses that she loved so much with an ample neckline and -from where Jane was standing now- she had front seats for the doctor's cleavage. And.. _wow._

She was having difficulties to concentrate no matter where she stood. A hard time trying to focus when Maura was around. Damn Korsak and his stupid words that brought those feelings to the surface. They'd been perfectly fine all this years hiding in a remote space of her mind. Now she couldn't suppress them anymore, they had come with vengeance in full force and she didn't know how much time she had before they explode and cause a war.

Korsak begun to mention the facts they had about the murder in a vain attempt to drag Jane out of her thoughts. She was still focused in her best friend. _Her beautiful best friend. And her beautiful legs and the way her muscles flexed as she stood up. And those calves so toned after years of high heels._

Maura staggered a little as she was standing up so Jane offered a hand to help her but Maura just ignored it. She was perfectly capable of standing by herself. She didn't need anyone else. Even less Jane, who noticed her weird attitude but just peer at her with a quizzical expression that Maura once again ignored.

Instead, she crouched to pick a few thing that were left on the ground, put them in her bag and stood up one again to face Korsak, "I'll do the autopsy as soon as I can. I'll let you know when I have a cause of death".

"I'm pretty sure that the all the knife's wounds on her stomach had something to do with it", said Jane trying to lighten the mood. The air in the scene was so tense that could be cut it with plastic scissors.

Jane realized that her attempt of a joke was a bad idea as soon as her best friend turned her head and met her eyes with a scowl. She felt like if the daggers that were coming out of those beautiful hazel eyes hurt more than the knives probably had hurt the woman on the ground.

"You can't possibly know if her wounds were caused by a knife or if that was exactly what lead her to death. If you could, then my job here would be useless and I like to think that all the years of my life that I spent studying to come to do this weren't a waste of time. So I'll take this body to the morgue, do the autopsy, find the exact cause of death and then I will let you know, so you can do your job. But first you have to let me do mine, _detective_."

Silence.

If Jane had though that the daggers before had hurt she was wrong.

What was going on?

She stood slack-jawed staring at Maura. She didn't understand what had just happened or why. She tried to recall if she had done something wrong to bother that much her friend but she couldn't think of anything. The last time she'd seen her was in the cafe that morning and when Maura left she seemed a little doleful but not angry. Why was she being so hostile now?

Maura made a nod toward Korsak and walked away and Jane was so stunned that failed to said anything, she just stood there still looking to where Maura had walked away.

"You really screwed it this time, Jane." Korsak said in a disapproving tone.

She turned around and pointed a finger in his direction, "you don't even talk to me." And then look back around to look at the retracting blue prius.

Korksak raised his hand in surrender and told her in a much lower voice, "this is not my fault and you know it. Grow some balls Rizzoli. You are missing your chance."

She looked at him glowering, anger and confusion written all over her face, "You have no idea what are you talking about and I'm tired of your nosy self. You are starting to look like my mother."

And with that she walked to Frankie to see what he got, before throwing a "I'll see you at the precinct" at him and Korsak and walking away.

She needed to find out what the hell was going on.

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><p>On the way back to the precinct, Maura was taken aback by her own outburst. She had not allowed herself to think about the conversation from that morning, but after that verbal aggression at Jane she couldn't avoided anymore, it was obvious that the detective would come to see her asking for some explanation later and if she didn't start to think and find a logical explanation for her sudden explosion, it would only made things worse.<p>

The true of the thing was that deep inside she knew what had happened but didn't want to admit it. If she did, that would only make her feel -more- badly with herself. But it was that or made Jane pay for it.

The true was that she couldn't understand how she hadn't realized before that Jane had never told her how she felt about her. Maura had told her a couple of times but her friend had never said that words back, and now she felt stupid for not noticed and was starting to overthink everything. That maybe Jane just hangs out with her out of pity, that maybe she didn't really care about her but didn't know how to let her down easily, and -the worse of all- that maybe Jane didn't love her.

And she didn't want to admit how much _that_ hurt her.

But at the same time it was weird because she felt loved by Jane. How could every moment they had spent together been false? Was she so blind in her own feeling for the detective that she was mixing things?

Maura was confused. She had a lot of questions and didn't have a way to answer them. And that take her back because she wasn't used to that feeling. And she realized that it was precisely that lack of answers what made her angry, but not with Jane. She was mad at herself.

And it didn't matter how much she needed answers, she wouldn't ask Jane for them. She wouldn't ask why she had never expresses her feeling. She wouldn't beg for love. She never did and she'll never will. There was a limit. Even for her.

And if Jane came to her asking for an explanation, that's exactly what she'll -try to- tell her.

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><p>When Jane walked into the precinct like an hour later, she was struggling with going directly to the morgue and talk with Maura or do it later.<p>

Maybe now was for the best, she knew that she wouldn't going to get any work done with Maura's words still running in her head.

But on the other hand, maybe later was for the best, that way she could think better of what to say and probably Maura would cool down by the end of the day and talk to her would be easier, free from the heat of the moment.

_'Yes, later is better. Later it is'_, She decided as she approached the elevators. But clearly her mind had other better ideas because instead of pressing the button up, she pressed the one that would take her directly to the morgue and when the doors opened, she step inside without noticing.

She was biting her nails looking at the ground when the doors opened to reveal the morgue floor. _Fucking mind_.

But well, now that she was here she could actually talk this out now and end with whatever was going on to continue her day without the headache she'll probably get if she kept thinking about it.

As she walked into the autopsy room, Maura was just inspecting the body and didn't even look up when she hear the door. She probably recognized the heavy sound of her boots.

Jane kept walking until she was next to the body across from Maura, just like at the crime scene, but this time they were both standing. Even then her friend didn't look up. _Why does she have to make this so hard?_

"Maura," she tried. Nothing.

"Can you to look at me, please?" She tried again.

The doctor raised her head and look at her in the eyes.

"Thank you," Jane said with an smile, but before she could said anything else, Maura looked down again. Damn it.

"Maura, I really need you to talk to me. What was that outburst at the crime scene? Why did you snapped at me like that?" when Maura still hadn't looked up, she tried in a much softer voice, "Maur, I really want to know what's going on."

A "so am I" escaped Maura's lips in form of a whisper before she could stop it.

"What was that?" Jane asked as she stooped a little and moved her head trying to catch the doctor's eyes.

"I'm kind of busy right now, detective," answered Maura with a cold tone. Cold as the ice that Jane felt running through her veins slowly freezing a new part of her body by every second that Maura didn't look at her.

"Maura, come on! Stop calling me detective and tell me what's gotten into you!" Jane said raising her voice. She was getting frustrated but she came for an explanation and wouldn't leave without one, "Sweetie, what's wrong?" she tried using that soft voice again, hoping that it'd do the trick this time.

And apparently it was successful because Maura raised her head and look at her with a fake smile.

"Nothing. There's nothing wrong." Okay, lying couldn't be considered as successful.

"You know you are my best friend and I can tell when you are lying, right?"

"No, I don't know." Maura keep talking with that tone that was freezing Jane. But now she wasn't making any sense.

"What?" Jane asked as she walked around the table to stand beside the doctor, grabbed her by the hands and turned her around to look at her.

Maura's face hadn't even changed a little bit since she raised her head and it was getting harder for the detective to read it.

"I meant that I don't know if I am your best friend."

Okay, now this was getting ridiculous.

"Maura what the hell are you talking about?" Jane was getting desperate by the second. She didn't understood where was all this coming from. It couldn't be from the untold 'I love you', it had to do with more than that but she couldn't figure it out.

Maura puffed, moved her hands to free them from Jane's soft grasp and turned to face the body again, "Hmm. And you call yourself detective." _Damn it, bitchy Maura was a piece of work._

"That's it," Jane said taking Maura by the arm and leading her to her office.

Once inside, Jane closed the door behind her and walked to kneel down in front of Maura, who had sat on the couch.

"Honey, we are getting nowhere and this is getting tiring," she begun, testing her luck by taking Maura's hands again, "I need you to look at me and tell me exactly was gotten into you. Is this because of the conversation we had earlier with Korsak?"

When Maura kept looking purposely to the ground and didn't answer her, Jane took it as a yes, "I really don't know what this got you so mad. You know exactly how I am. I'm not a sentimental person but I think that I've let you know multiple times how much I care about you. And it kind of hurt me that you doubt of my friendship but-"

"No, Jane. I don't doubt of your friendship," Maura finally give in when she saw the desperation in her friend's eyes and she realized that she was right, this was getting nowhere, "I really don't. I'm sorry, I just.. The situation of this morning took me aback and I started to overthink everything. I know that you care about me and I know how you feel. I'm really sorry for how I treated you before."

"It's okay, Maur. I understand why this happened, but that doesn't mean that I will accept it. I don't like you to doubt of us," _Us?!_ "-I mean me. I don't like you to doubt about me and our friendship. I promise I'll do everything I can to dissipate all your doubts and make sure that they never appear around your head again."

"You don't have to. That's really not necessary, Jane."

"I know I don't. I want to_._"_ It's the least I can do since I'm a coward and can't tell you how much I actually love you._

Maura grinned a little, "well, it's not that hard." _Yes it is._

Jane smiled a little and stood up to sit next to Maura without letting go of her hands, "I'll work on it. I promise." She said with a squeeze at Maura's hands.

"Thank you," replied Maura with that big and beautiful dimpled smile that was reserved just for Jane.

Neither of them knew how much time had passed since Jane walked into the autopsy room, but it felt like couple of seconds and a couple of hours at the same time.

"I have to go now. Korsak will kill me if I don't appear soon." Jane said as she stood up and without thinking gave Maura a kiss on her forehead that neither of them alluded. It was either like it'd never happened or like they were completely used to it.

When Jane reached the door, she turned around to look at Maura again, who had stood up as well and was stretching the invisible wrinkles of her scrubs before go finish the autopsy. Those damn black scrubs.

"Maura," Jane said and her friend look at her with the same smile that before, "I.." She tried to continue but was completely at lost at the hopeful look that she saw on those bright hazel eyes.

She could point that out as the exact moment when she knew that if she ever said to Maura how much she loved her, she'll make sure that it was in the most beautiful and perfect way that she could think of. "-I'll see you later." She finished and quickly turned around and walked away before she could see that smile disappear into a disappointed face.

Little she knew that Maura had just smiled bigger -if that was even possible. She didn't doubt of her friend's feelings anymore. How could she? Maura was a expert at reading emotions through faces and even though she'd always had a hard time trying to read her best friend's face, the smile that Jane had on her face when she was standing at the door and the way that it reached her eyes closing them a little and forming a little wrinkle in the corners was pure adoration and she trusted that jane would tell her how she feel when she is ready.

Just then her phone buzzed indicating a new message and she felt like her face would break if she smiled bigger when she saw Jane's name across the screen.

_"I'm glad not mad at me anymore. Bitchy you is not my favorite you. JK. Have a nice afternoon ;) "_

Yeah, she knew that Jane will tell her those three words when she was ready and that was fine. And if she never tell her, that was fine too. She didn't need them. As long as she had these little details she was fine. This was enough.

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><p><strong>AN 2: As always, I appreciate if you had time to left a review. At least pass by to say yes or not to this. And please remember try to be gentle if you are going to criticize.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Say Anything**

**Chapter 3**

**Disclaimer: Jane and Maura don't belong to me and blah blah blah.**

**A/N:**** Hi! I swear that I tried to update sooner but med school and life make it a little harder. Thank you so much to all of you that had demonstrated some kind of interest in this story. It means a lot, so I really appreciate it. I hope that you like this chapter. Let me read your thoughts :)**

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><p>Jane was sitting in her desk with her elbows on the table and her chin resting above them. Her mind was going a thousand miles a minute and every single thought revolve around one single person. Maura Isles.<p>

A week had passed since the fight and late conversation with Maura and things had been great. For their own sake -and the sake of their friendship- they moved on just like before. They had come to a silent mutual agreement of pretend like the question Korsak made that morning at the cafe hadn't happened at all.

Of course, not so deep inside, they both were aware that had changed them, but neither of them was willing to do something about it. _Yet._

Even though Jane had accepted that their friendship was all she would get for now, she couldn't help but think how great life will be when -if, Jane. If- they took the next step in their relationship. How great it would be get home at night together and wake up every morning in each other arms. Days would be always good if that smile is the first thing she saw in the morning and the last before sleep. They would spend the free weekends sleeping late, and watching the games cuddling on the couch -she would be willing to even watch some bored documental if that would mean cuddle time for them.

_When did I stopped thinking about her and started thinking about us?_

And what an 'us' they would be.

And what about their future kids? God. She didn't even wanted to start to think in a little Maura running around the house, With her soft curly blonde hair and her beautiful hazel eyes and her little face full of freckles, just like her mother.

Jane was in love with that thought. But in order for that to work, she would have to get the courage enough to actually tell Maura about her feelings. But again, she couldn't risk it. It was too much to lose. But at the same time, if it worked out, it would be _so_ much to win.

She was in the middle of that conflicted thought when was suddenly interrupted by Frankie, who came storming very loudly into the headquarters with a box of donuts, gave one to Korsak, left one on in front of her and then walked to his own desk to devour the rest of the contents of the box.

"Hmmm", Frankie murmured with her mouth full and sugar all around her face. "These are so good. I really love this new deli down the street. I like this donuts a lot more than the ones from the old place. You should be thankful that I considered bringing one to each of you." He took another bite. "God, I really love them."

"That's not the same." Jane didn't even realize that she had verbalized that thought until Frankie spoke again.

"What?" He said absently, not really caring for her sister' words.

She snapped out of her thoughts and turned to look at him. "What, what?"

"You said something."

_What was the point in deny it?_ "Oh, yeah, I said that it's not the same."

Frankie had just take another bite so he was with his mouth full again and was trying really hard to swallow to ask her what was she talking about.

Meanwhile, Korsak, who was sat on her desk and had witnessed the whole situation, noticed the face that Jane had when she spoke the first time. It was the same face she had in the car before she went out that morning. That Maura-Exclusively face.

When he saw that Frankie was too busy eating and still hadn't asked Jane what she meant, he spoke. "What's not the same?"

She sigh and pointed absently to her brother, "he first said that he really likes the donuts, but then he said that he loves them, as affirming his first statement, but that's not the same."

Frankie chuckled and spat out a little, "you are spending too much time with Maura, you sounded just like her," he said as he cleaned his mouth.

Korsak, on the other hand, just kept looking at her without saying anything, hoping for her to elaborate that thought, but she just stared back at him sure that he understood and wouldn't ask anything else. Even less in front of her brother.

Frankie, who finally swallowed, raised his head at the silence to look at them without understanding what was happening.

"Oh-kay," he found Jane's face kind of amusing and was now interested in what her sister had to say. "Care to elaborate for us, Janie?" He encouraged her in a playful tone.

Jane turned to look at him. "They are two completely different things. I, for example, like... Someo-thing. Something." She closed her eyes and took a breath trying to concentrate and express her point without revealing much, "I really like.. it. But not because of that I'll throw myself to it without thinking about the consequences for us. I could like anything. But love is different.. Love her is different." She said that last part a little softer, almost dreamy and didn't even realized that she wasn't speaking about an 'it' anymore and had started talking about 'her', but neither Korsak or Frankie pointed it out so she assumed that they hadn't noticed. "You just don't _love _someone. They have to sneak into you, take all your organs and reduce them until all of them could get inside your stomach and before you realize, you'll be around afire with an 'I love you' that burn your throat."

Silence. An utter and complete silence.

Then Jane realized what she had just said. She'd just came out to her brother. Kind of.

She look at him with wide eyes, waiting for him to say something and wondering how long it would be before her mother found out about this. Then she turned to look at Korsak as asking for help. In vain. _Of course_. He was as stunned as Frankie was.

Jane felt like years had passed before Frankie cleared her throat. "Wow. To talk like that about love you have to be more than head over heels with someone or with a really broken heart. And honestly, I don't know which one is worse."

_That was all? He wasn't going to said anything? _

"Frankie-" Jane tried to explain but before she could finish her sentence, he interrupted her.

"Don't worry sis, I just like the donut. My organs are fine." He said with a little smile as he stood up and walked to the break room.

She turned her head to look at Korsak but he was with his mouth still open – just like her.

When she finally got out of her almost shocked state, she decided that just leave things like that wasn't wise – _right, cause you are making so much wiser decisions this last time_- and need some kind of answers from Frankie, so she stood up as well and followed him to where he had just disappear at the break room.

She found him at coffee maker preparing some to pour in her mug. She stood by the counter at the other side of the room.

"You really aren't going to say anything?" Jane didn't even know what she expected to hear as an answer to that question.

"About what?" He asked with his back to her.

"About what just happened."

"What's wrong with it?" He said nonchalantly.

_A million things_.

Jane needed more than that. An opinion. A speech. A yell. Something. She needed to know how he felt about it.

She sighed, "Frankie-"

"So, which one is it?" He interrupted her again, "Crazy in love or with a broken heart? "

A silence fell on the room. Jane didn't know if she wanted to admit which one it was because that might lead to some conclusion from him and wasn't sure if she was ready for it.

"Crazy", she murmured anyways, with her head down.

He finally turned to look at her with a little grin on his face. "Yeah, that's what i thought."

"It doesn't bother you?" Jane was almost praying inside to get a 'no', she wasn't prepared for a yes. All her life, Frankie had always been a huge part of her support group and if he didn't was there for her this time she wouldn't know how to handle it.

Frankie stared at her. Her sister didn't need to say the exact words of what she was asking, he understood. And –to be honest- he wasn't surprised. Little Janie had never been the 'lady' kind of girl, but he also knew that she had to have some fears regarding it, so he needed to make this like it wasn't a big deal, "What? That you feel that way? Nah, I'm happy for you."

She smiled at him, asking to herself why she had doubts about him in the first place "I'm sorry I didn't told you before. And that it had to be that way."

"Don't worry." He waved his hand as he sipped his coffee. "We are good."

They look at each other smiling; they had come to a mutual and silent understatement.

They looked at each other smiling; they had come to a mutual understanding.

Frankie finally moved from where he was standing to sit at the table at the middle of the room, patting the chair next to him for her sister to join him.

"So," he said taking another sip of her coffee waiting for her to sit beside him. "Are you going to tell me who is she? Do I know her?"

"Yes, you do." She answered him without giving it another thought. He deserved to know.

"I don't even know why I asked," he chuckled.

_There's no way that he could know, _"What do you mean?"

"It's pretty obvious." He shrugged like it was nothing.

Jane couldn't believe how blind she'd been. "How come everyone seems to know about this except me?"

"Well, you were always a little slow when we were kids," he said in a playful tone, earning himself a punch from his sister in his arm.

"You idiot," she told him, both laughing now.

It was good for the atmosphere surrounding them. Along the years, her talks with Frankie had always been like this, a little serious, a little playful. It was how they deal with things.

When the laughter subsided, he got back to the serious yet soft tone that she was expecting. "So, what are you going to do about it?"

"Nothing." She didn't even have to think of that answer.

"What do you mean nothing?" Her brother looked at her like she was crazy.

She sighed, "What can I do Frankie? It's too much."

"Too much what? Feelings? Happiness?"

"Too much to lose." She said with a little sorrow in her voice that he immediately picked.

"Janie-"

"What if I risk it and I lose, Frankie?" Defeated, she looked at him directly in the eyes.

"What if you risk it and you win?"

Jane didn't say anything; she didn't have an argument for that.

"When did you become so wise?" And there it was the playful part again.

He chuckled, "While you were too in love with your best friend to notice anything else around you."

That made her smile again. It was amazing how he do it.

"I gotta go. I just came to pour some coffee in this," he said pointing at his mug.

"Thank you, Frankie."

"It's okay." And after giving Jane a kiss on her forehead, he left her alone again.

She was still at there when Korsak came in to pour some coffee for him too. Jane had tried to avoid being alone with him because they hadn't talked directly about the topic since the morning at the cafe and she was absolutely sure that if she stayed that would be the first thing he would probably bring up.

Well no, she wasn't _that_ sure, but why took a chance?

He walked to the counter with her back to her, "Jane-"

"I'm not talking about this right now, Korsak," she told him firmly as she stood up.

"Jane-" Korsak tried again while he turned around to face her, but before he could ask anything else, Jane was already gone.

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><p>"Hey." Jane walked in the autopsy room where Maura was elbows deep in the thorax of the man lying in the table.<p>

A wide smile appeared instantly on the doctor's face. "Hi!" Surprise evident in her voice, "what are you doing here?"

"I'm happy to see you, too."

"I didn't mean it like that. I'm sorry." She put her arm out of the thorax and leaned on the table. "I'm just surprised; I thought you were interrogating some suspects."

"Nah, we don't have any lead. You found anything?" Jane asked as she moved to stand in front of the doctor.

"Not yet. But I already took blood examples and I can deliver the results myself to you when they are ready because I think that I need a little break. And then I'll make Susie take you the results from the tox screens later while I finish the autopsy."

She spoke like hundred words a minute but Jane didn't care. This was just what she needed. Maura digressing. Maura's voice. Maura.

"Is everything okay?" The doctor glanced at her friend through her goggles.

Jane looked at her and shook her head. "Yeah, sorry. My mind was somewhere else." _On you._

Maura kept staring as the brunette seemed lost in her thoughts again. She took off her goggles. "That's why you are here?"

"Nah, I'm here trying to hide from Korsak and her stupid questions."

"Oh." Maura tried to hide her disappointment; she didn't have reasons to feel like this. Jane always came here when she was trying to avoid something or someone. This wasn't new.

Of course, she wasn't as subtle as she thought trying to hide her emotions, Jane knew her too well, "And I thought you could use some company, too." Jane added with a full smile, showing her dimples.

The previous face dissipated completely from Maura's face, replacing it with a smile just as big as the detective's, "Yeah, I would like that."

Jane sat at the table next to the one that was currently in use, swinging her legs like a 5 year old as she watched Maura put her goggles on again and continued working in the comfortable silence that embraced them.

It never ceases to amaze her how Maura could be with half of her arm with blood and body contents and still look beautiful and classy. And she never thought that she could use the word "elegance" to describe how her medical examiner did the autopsies. _Her _medical examiner

She closed her eyes while a '_don't go there_' repeat itself in a loop inside her head. Instead, she tried to focus on something else. Something less.. distracting.

The scrubs. Those black scrubs that weren't even tight, but could still make her look so hot. But then again, Maura could wear a trash bag and still look good because she had this fantastic curvy figure and Jane had a lot of imagination to picture in her head what was under it and- _Don't! Forget the scrubs and Maura's body._

Her shoes! Yeah, her shoes and how different they were from the designer high heels that the doctor was accustomed to wear. These shoes were simpler and didn't add much height for her and that made her look so tiny and cute and Jane just wanted to hug her because she knew that her height difference would leave Maura with her face at the crook of her neck and her lips could brush against her pulse point and- _No! Don't even go there._

The body lying in front of her wasn't that much interesting and even less attractive so she refused to start thinking about it. Besides, it was a dead man, just.. No_._

Just in that moment something shine from somewhere between all that blood.

The scalpel! Yeah! The scalpel and how it cut so easily the flesh in front of it like it was paper and how skillful was Maura with it and how she managed it like it wasn't the sharpest of blades and how steady she kept it with those strong hands.

The hands. _No! No! Turn around! Abort mission!_

This wasn't working. She couldn't just focus on anything and she would go insane if she tried any longer.

"I probably should get back to work. Go over the things we got again." She didn't even look at Maura's face. She knew that if she did, that would be her ending.

"Okay, I think the blood result should be ready soon, so I'll bring them to you in a while," answered Maura, oblivious to all that had happened.

"Okay, see you later." And with that she headed upstairs.

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><p>As the day passed, Jane found trouble concentrating everywhere she went. That had led her to take a walk to try and clear her mind a little.<p>

She had been fine all week, but the talk with Frankie was setting everything on fire again. _If this will happen every time that I tell someone about this I'll be burned before I have the chance to confess it to Maura._

Now she was back at the bullpen and Korsak followed her as soon as she passed beside his desk in direction to the break room. He had seen her distracted all day and thought of it as the perfect opportunity to try and have a talk. That could lead him to some answers or some hell. With Jane you never know.

He found her in front of the coffee maker, pouring some of it into the filter before start it. It was perfect. She would wait until it was ready. That give him a few minutes.

"Is everything okay with Frankie?"

She closed her eyes and sighed. _Damn Korsak_. "Perfect."

He tried to think how to approach the subject and when he realized there it wasn't a soft way he just blurted, "Jane, why are you doing this to yourself?"

She sighed, "Vince, please-"

"I just can't understand it." He moved to stand beside her.

Jane turned around to lean her back on the counter and crossed her arms. "What do you want me to say?"

"It's not me who I want you to say something."

She rubbed her eyes. "I can't, Korsak."

"You can't what?"

"I just can't tell Maura that I love her because it's not just that!" _Well, that scalded quickly._

"Then what it is? Enlighten me!"

Their conversation had –not so slowly- elevated their tones and if they didn't stopped, probably the whole bullpen would hear it.

"I'm in love with her! I love her so much more than my best friend."

"That's it?" Korsak chuckled. "That's the lie you've been telling yourself? I already knew it. You'll have to work better than that."

"You.. what?" She looked at him with her eyes wide open and a dumbfounded expression.

"Come on, Jane! I suspected something before but with what you said in the morning about love it was pretty clear to anyone who had heard it. And now that I think about it, you can't possibly think that nobody else sees how much you two love each other."

"You were right before. You don't understand." She shook her head.

Korsak raised a finger and smiled. "I actually do. You are scared that she doesn't feel the same. But believe me, I can see that she does."

Jane puffed. "You can't possibly know that."

As he laughed, she turned to look at him glowering. "What's so funny?"

"Nothing, just.. you sound just like her right now." His laugh finally subsided. "Listen; how do you pretend to know if she does feel the same if you don't give her a chance?"

"It's not that simple." She sounded defeated.

Korsak shrugged. "It seems pretty simple to me."

"No, Korsak. It isn't that simple!" Jane was getting frustrated. The sergeant had developed an amazing deftness to get under her skin.

"Why are you making this so hard? What are you so afraid of?"

This shit was getting old and Jane had neither the time nor the desire to continue with this. "Vince, I really don't want to keep talking about this. I already did with Frankie and I'm getting tired."

"Okay," He said with his hands up in surrender, "If that's what you want, fine. I won't push it, but it's your bad. I was just trying to help. I'll keep bothering you another day, and I promise that I will until the day you talk to me and I can put some sense into you until you tell her how you feel." Jane looked at him wearied. "And I'm not scared of how you may treat me, because I'm not doing this for me, and you know it. You are tired of this topic and I'm tired of seeing you always walking at the opposite direction of your happiness sign. So keep running and I'll keep screaming at you from the bleachers to turn around and run to the other side."

Jane kept her head down all through that last part of Korsak's speech –a speech that she wasn't expecting, now she didn't know how to answer, but she was starting to understand all this pressure from him.

She looked at him with watery eyes. "I get it, and I…" She sniffed, "thank you for looking out for me."

He gave her a nod and raised his hands to wipe her eyes with his thumbs. "You know I always will."

She smiled gratefully and came closer to him to give her a hug. There was always something so heartwarming in his embrace, it felt like hugging a huge teddy.

When they finally pull apart, he took her by her arms softly and moved them both to sit.

"Are you going to tell me what got you so afraid?"

She gave in and murmured, "Losing her."

"What?"

She sighed and met his gaze, "Losing her. I'm afraid that if I tell her how I feel she would reject me and I'll lose her."

Jane was trying hard to keep her tears at bay, but they had accumulated in her eyes again and she couldn't control them anymore. They started to fall.

"Oh Janie." He put her arms around her shoulders and brought her closer to him. He didn't even want to remember the last time he saw Jane Rizzoli cry.

"I can't lose her, Vince", she said between sobs with her head in his shoulder.

"You won't, Janie. Trust me, she feel the same for you."

"How can you be so sure?"

"How can you not?" Korsak said pulling away to look her in the eyes, "Look, I really don't like to snoop in other's lifes," he paused to see the tilt of her head and the ´really?' from her mouth, but it never came. "But I just can't stand here and watch so much love wasted. If you could just see the way that Maura looks at you when she thinks that no one is watching her." He closed her eyes briefly and allowed his memory to bring back that image, "God Jane, you wouldn't have any doubt by now. It's so plain to see. She loves you as much as you love her."

"That's not possible," she said as she wiped her eyes.

He snorted, "Why do you have to be so stubborn all the time?"

"I'm not being stubborn." Jane stood up and started pacing front of him from one side to the other.

It was Korsak that tilted his head and look at her unbelievable this time.

"You really don't understand anything, do you? " She deadpanned.

"I already told you that I think I do."

"No! You don't! It's not that simple! You said that you know that I love her," she started pacing again and continue talking as she ran a hand through her hair, "damn, everyone in here thinks that they know, but it's not that simple. I-"

He looked at her expectantly.

She put her hand in front of her eyes before turning to face him again, putting both of her hands in the back of the chair in front of her, a desperate try to hold into something. She thought in Maura and took a deep breath.

"The love I have for her is.. It's more that I can put into words. I don't even know how to begin to describe it." She chuckled. "When I see her, damn, even when I think of her I smile so big that my muscles hurt. When I see her eyes I feel like I could lose myself in them and I wouldn't even care. She takes my breath away every time that I see her. And then she just have to look at me and that's enough to bring me back to life. Her smile has been what pushed the air into my lungs since the first day I saw her. I learned to love her so much in so little time that terrified me, but she fit so perfectly with what I've never looked but apparently always needed that I don't think I would have it any other way. I don't just like her; this is not just a little crush. I love her more that I've never thought it was possible."

Jane closed her eyes as she expected his answer, but it never came. When she looked at him again, it was so see him with his mouth hanging open and looking at a point past her shoulder. She turned around to see what was more interesting that the answer he had been pushing from the last week and –she guessed- finally got.

The colors drained from her face and her knees trembled.

The door was open and in there -with a file in her arms and her mouth slightly open in surprise- she came face to face with the bright and hazel eyes of the one and only Maura Isles.


	4. Chapter 4

**Say Anything**

**Chapter 4**

**Disclaimer: These characters don't belong to me. **

**A/N:**** I'm really sorry for the delay of this chapter but I had final exams these past weeks on med school and I was focused on that. The good new is that now I'm on vacations (wohoo!) so I should be able to post more frequently. **

**Thanks for all the reviews on the last chapter, now here's this :)**

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><p><em>She turned around to see what was more interesting that the answer he had been pushing from the last week and –she guessed- finally got. <em>

_The colors drained from her face and her knees trembled. _

_The door was open and in there -with a file in her arms and her mouth slightly open in surprise- she came face to face with the bright and hazel eyes of the one and only Maura Isles._

...

_This couldn't be happening._

"How long have you been standing there?"

"I'll leave you two alone" Korsak said as he stood up. When he was passing beside Jane, he stopped and put a hand in her shoulder, gave her a sympathetic smile and then he was gone, closing the door behind him.

They stood there staring at each other, Maura still close by the door and Jane now leaned in the table. Neither of them knew what to say or how to say it.

It seems like years had passed in silence before Maura decided to talk.

"You never told me you were so in love." Her voice was soft, almost a whisper.

Jane lowered her head and closed her eyes. She hadn't thought of telling Maura the truth, even less that it would be this way. But the cat was now out of the bag, so she took a deep breath and prepared herself to face the music. "Maura, I-"

"Were you afraid of what I was going to say if you tell me that is a female?" Maura interrupted her before she could even begin to explain and this change in direction of the conversation was setting a completely new purpose of it.

"I-" Jane raised her head and looked at her confused. "What?"

"Jane, I don't care whom you love." Maura thanked all the deities -in which she didn't believe- that the chill weather had made her wear a scarf today. The hives in her chest would be impossible to ignore. "I've never heard you speak so much about your feeling for someone else and if she makes you happy I'm happy too." She was trying really hard to keep her tears at bay. Unsuccessfully, obviously. They still hoarded in her eyes, even though they hadn't fell yet.

Jane sighed. "Maura, it's not what you think." She shook her head and corrected herself, "I mean yes, but no.. not in the way that you are thinking." She hated herself for not knowing how to express what she was trying to say.

Maura looked at her kind of confused, the detective wasn't making much sense but she let it pass.

"Jane it's all right, you must have your reasons why you didn't tell me. It's fine." She said as she sniffed.

The brunette moved from where she was leaning on the table to stand in front of her best friend and looked at her looking for some kind of clue on Maura's face, some kind of 'go ahead', a green light. Anything.

"If everything is as fine as you say then why are you crying?"

"Because is just nice." The blonde woman sniffed again. She was losing the battle against her lacrimal gland. "Hear that you feel so much for someone. It's nice. I just wish.." She trailed off, thinking. This was a huge step and she almost gave it without thinking. She almost let herself step into a void.

Maura look at the detectives in the eyes and misunderstood the expression of her face like the one of someone who begged to not hear what the other person was about to say. She thought that Jane didn't want her ruining her moment.

But the true of the things was that the expression on Jane's face was pure hope.

"What? What do you wish?" Jane's words were almost a whisper. Neither of them realized that they had come very close to each other, their faces just inches apart. _Oh it would so easy to just kiss her now._

"Nothing." Maura said finally, shaking her head, taking a step back and turning around. "Nothing. Just.." She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "She must be very lucky."

Jane passed around Maura and stood in front of her again taking both of the doctor's hands in hers and moving her thumbs to caress them. The look on Maura's face was making almost impossible for her to keep the words inside herself. _Maybe it's time._

"Maur-"

"I should go check if the lab results are ready." Maura pulled her hands away from the detective and turned around to leave but Jane caught her by the wrist and turned her back around to face her, making her bodies collided into each other.

They look at each other eyes and Maura wasn't sure if the detective was really stealing glances at her lips or it was just her mind playing tricks on her. She decided for the last and -to avoid further confusion- took a step back.

"No Maura, please. Don't do this to me again." Jane's eyes were pleading.

"Do what?" Maura asked confused and with a frown.

"Leave me."

"What do you mean leave you? I could never-"

"You did it that morning," Jane interrupted, "that morning at the café, remember? When all of this started. We were talking and then you just left and didn't even let me speak. I tried to stop you but you ignored me and kept walking."

Of course Maura remembered. She couldn't find a way to get out of there sooner once that Jane's lack of expression of her feeling had settled deep inside her.

"I had to go finish the report from the case we were working on." _Again, thank the all the deities for the scarf._

"No, Maura," Jane said firmly, "when you went to the café you had already finished it because it was in my desk. And now you don't have to go check if the results are back because you told me that Susie would bring them to me as soon as she has them. I don't know if you learned to lie or if the scarf around your neck had something to do with you trying to do it." _Damn all the deities_. "But please don't do it anymore, Maur. Don't lie to me."

Maura lower her head and looked downcast at the floor. Suddenly her shoes had become a very interesting piece. She didn't want to look at Jane in the eyes. She felt ashamed of being caught, guilty for trying to lie to her friend and stupid for trying to lie to a detective no less.

Jane took her chin between her index finger and her thumb and lifted it to meet those beautiful hazel eyes that made her forget everything she was talking about. "Can you just.. stay with me for a while in here? I just wanna talk to you."

Maura didn't want to be there. She just wanted to go home. She didn't know if she was capable of hearing Jane talk about her feeling for someone else. It would be too much and she didn't see the point of that kind of torture to herself.

"I really should go to see why Susie is taking so long in the tox screens." She tried once.

"There's no need to. I'm not in a hurry now." Failed.

"We should not monopolize the breakroom. Others detectives may want to use it as well." She tried a second time.

"There's no one around and we have a coffee machine at the side of bullpen. By the way do you want coffee?"

Maura was thinking what else she could say as an excuse, because telling Jane that she just didn't want to stay would lead to more questions and possibly a visit later to her office looking for answers and she really didn't want that.

"It looks like you run out of excuses." Jane said with a little grin fixed in her face.

The doctor stared at her and Jane was able to see her expression changed from deadpanned to defeated.

"Yes."

"Yes you do want coffee or yes you run out of excuses?" Her friend asked with a playful tone.

"Both." She finally gave in.

"That's what I thought." Jane smiled at her as she walked to the table and pulled out a chair gesturing Maura to sit and then moved to the counter to make some coffee for her and her friend.

Jane took it as an opportunity. Maura knew she was in love but didn't know who it was, didn't know it was her all along. She could try to see how her best friend was feeling about it. If Maura feel the same way about her, she could maybe turn on some jealousy sparkles. Taste the waters. _It couldn't hurt her, right?_

Maura had sat on the table in the middle of the room and was looking at her friend working on her coffee. When Jane reached up to get some mugs from a cabinet above and her shirt lifted a little showing a little glimpse of her taut abs Maura couldn't stop the urge to lick her lips. Now she had her bottom lip between her teeth and didn't realize how hard she was biting it until she tasted blood in her mouth_. Idiot._

Jane begun to pour coffee into the mugs on the counter with her back still to her friend.

"She doesn't know." She said finally after a long silence, but Maura was still distracted checking her out.

"Hmm?" She shook her head to get out of her thoughts once she realized that the detective had spoken.

"The woman I.. I'm in love with. She doesn't know."

Maura looked at Jane's back. This was the conversation she was trying to avoid but now that her friend had started it, ending it abruptly would only raise suspicions on the detective and she couldn't do that.

"How can she not know?"

"I haven't told her." Jane said nonchalantly.

"Why not?"

"I don't know." She shrugged and turned to the table with both coffees, passing one to the doctor and pulling back a chair to sit next to her. "Maybe I'm scared."

Maura was taking a sip of her coffe and almost spat a little when she heard those words, wiping her mouth delicately with a napkin afterwards. Actions that didn't pass over Jane, who was now definitely staring at her best friend's lips.

"In all the time I've known you I've never hear you admit that you are scared of something." Said the blonde. "What are you scared of?"

Jane looked at her directly in the eyes. "I'm not sure. Losing her, maybe?"

Maura leaned a little closer and her next words were spoken softly but challenging. "How can you lose something that you don't actually have?"

_Touché. _

"I.. You are right. I don't have her. But I could," she thought for a second, "eventually. If I lose her, I lose that chance too."

"You never will 'eventually' have her if you don't risk taking the first step." Maura said logically.

Unconsciously Jane gazed at Maura's lips before looking at her eyes again. "But what if she doesn't feel the same?"

With each sentence they had gotten closer and their faces were -once again- now inches from each other, breathing the same air.

Jane's heart was beating so fast that she felt like it was going to explode. She could smell Maura's perfume in full force and it felt like her scent was embracing her. She could felt Maura everywhere and was pretty sure that her friend was able to hear her heart beat now.

"She must be crazy for not loving you." Maura whispered, stealing glances at Jane's lips too.

_Bingo_.

Jane wasn't looking at her anymore; her gaze was completely focused on her lips. "Maura.."

And then Maura realized what she had just said and looked at her friend with wide eyes before leaning back abruptly.

_Crap. _

"I really have to go now." She stood up to walk away as fast as she could. "I'll see you later."

"Maura!" Jane stood up as well trying to catch her before she left but Maura was already at the door.

"I'll let Susie bring you the reports when they are ready," she said looking over her shoulder, almost running now.

And Jane ran after her. They were so close. There's no way they could bring the topic back if Maura run away once again.

"Maura wait!"

Maura had reached the elevators and was desperately pressing the down arrow as if that would make it come faster.

"I really can't, Jane. I'm sorry," she said pressing harder into the bottom before Jane could get to her.

Too late. Jane was already by her side, grabbing her by her upper arms and turning her to look at her pleading eyes. "Can't what Maura?!

"Jane! There you are!" An inopportune Korsak yell as he turned the corner of the hallway.

Jane closed her eyes tight. He could not have a worse timing.

"Not now Vince," she said clenching her teeth while Maura keep pressing the bottom harder -if that was even possible- and silently thanked Korsak for his interruption.

The ding announcing the arrival of the elevator seem to sound with an echo in the hallway and when Jane hear it she looked at Maura and tried to hold her tighter without hurting her, but the doctor just had to move a little her arms to get free and step into the elevator.

"Maura please," Jane tried again, "you can't what?" She repeated putting her hand on the door to prevent it from closing.

"Jane we got a suspect." Interrupter Korsak again getting impatient and without understanding what was going on and why was Jane so desperate.

"Can't wait a little longer?!" She almost yell at him and signalize with her fingers for him to go away, unconsciously raising her hand from the door of the elevator, which made it closed and finally left with Maura inside of it without an answer for her.

She tried pressing the down button of the wall again to see if the door opened but there was no such a luck. It was gone.

"Dammit Korsak!" She said punching the wall and storming away.

* * *

><p>"How could I be so stupid?"<p>

Maura kept repeating that question to herself over and over again as she paced back and forth in her office. That wasn't supposed to happen. Jane was in love with someone else. She couldn't choose exactly that moment to let her know of her feelings. What kind of friend would she be if she ruined her best friend's happiness like that? _And god, Jane sounded so happy._

But they almost kissed -or at least that Maura thought. She was sure that it wasn't just her, Jane had come closer as well. That couldn't have been part of her imagination. _Right?_

But then again maybe Jane had caught up in the moment and didn't realize what she was doing. What she was causing inside of Maura. She'd set free all those butterflies and even though Maura knew that there was no such a thing -_because it's impossible to grow lepidopterans inside your stomach_- she couldn't bring her mind to believe it.

This wasn't a thing about chemical reactions. There wasn't any neurotransmitter or enzymes or any other component. This was just Jane in her purest form running through her veins opening all these little jails and freeing these insects inside that seem to flap her wings harder against the walls of her heart, making it beat a hundred times stronger and faster. And even though Maura was well aware that all of this was wrong and against all that she'd learned in her life, her mind was completely disconnected from it and she was starting to get crazy because all of this was completely new to her. She didn't even know that she was able to feel this much and didn't know either _when_ she had fallen so hard for her best friend.

"Why did I let it go this far?" She said over and over again desperately because she couldn't stop what was happening -didn't know how. And the worst part was that she wasn't even sure if the wanted to, it was almost masochism, but she wouldn't be able to run away from Jane. She was unable to do that to her friend. It wasn't her fault after all. She wasn't the one who mixed things. Jane's mind was absolutely fine.

"How could I be so stupid?" She repeated a last time hitting her forehead with her palm as a few tears insist on falling and soon enough it wasn't just a few tears but so much more.

It seemed like hours had passed before Maura finally calmed down and decided to go home. There wasn't much she could do here anyway and her cry had wasted all her energy.

She reapplied her make up and went looking for Susie to let her know of her departure.

Just as expected, Maura found the senior criminalistic in the lab examining the last examples to finish the report that was due to deliver soon.

When Susie hear the door and raised her head to look at her boss at the door, the worried expression on her face let Maura know that she wasn't as successful as she though trying to cover her broken heart.

"Doctor Isles are you okay?"

"Yes Susie, I'm fine, thank you. I just wanted to let you know that I'm heading home."

Susie look to the wall watch over the doctor's shoulder just to confirm that it wasn't even lunch time yet and the blonde never left this earlier.

"Uhh.. okay? Are you sure you're okay?" She knew better than to ask her boss why she was leaving so early. It wasn't really her place.

"I already told you I'm fine." Maura's voice was hoarsely but she still spoke firmly. "I just have a little headache, I'll probably feel better with a little rest."

"If you said so.." Said Susie, still not convinced.

"I do." She passed her hand over the nonexistent wrinkles in her dress and stood straight, transferring the cold of her voice to her posture.

"Please let detective Rizzoli know when the lab results are ready."

"Of course," Susie hurried to say. "Don't worry about it."

"Great. I'll see you tomorrow Susie."

"Take care, Doctor Isles." Susie said as Maura turned around, but the blonde woman just left without any other word

* * *

><p>That afternoon found Jane sitting at her desk again, tired and with a headache that made her want to die.<p>

It had been such a long day but unfortunately not because of work. The day had had a little too many conversations for her liking and she didn't feel well. Aside from that, she had been in a bad mood all day. But it wasn't for Frankie anymore. Not even Korsak. It was Maura. It was always Maura. The responsible of all of Jane's feeling was Maura. The good, the bad and the others. Maura.

And today she had been so close of getting something from the doctor. There was a hint of something there but she needed to be sure. The problem was that she didn't know how to do it.

"I'm sorry about early." Korsak said suddenly, getting her out of her thoughts. They hadn't talked about what happened by the elevators early, they'd limited their interaction to work and to interrogate the suspect they had found.

"Not now, Korsak." Jane waved her hand but didn't even turn to look at him.

"Okay, I just wanted you to know that I'm sorry."

He was apologizing but something inside Jane made her feel like she was going to explode if he kept talking.

She counted to ten and then turned her head slightly to the right to look at him. "It's okay. We had a suspect. It was just bad timing."

Korsak just nodded in response and Jane turned back to her desk again to try to focus on her work. She just wanted to finish soon to head home, maybe even go down to try to talk to her best friend, given that she hadn't heard from her since the morning –not that it was weird considering the circumstances, but still.

The sergeant kept his gaze fixed on the brunette and let a couple of seconds pass before asking what had been eating him most part of the day. "Is everything okay with doctor Isles?"

But that was the final straw for Jane. She didn't even had the time to try to control her reaction, she threw the pen on her hand to the desk aggressively and turned herself fully to face him, glowering. "Does it seems like is everything okay?!"

All the people that were surrounded her turned to look at her outburst. She had to admit that it had been a really long while since she had lost the control that way on the bullpen.

Korsak kept looking at her, just as surprised as his colleagues and raised his hands in surrender.

Jane took a deep breath and waited until everyone's looks turned away before rub her eyes and talked again in a much softer voice. "I'm sorry Vince. I'm just frustrated."

He understood. He always did.

"What happened?"

"Maura happened." Jane sighed.

If she was completely honest with herself, Maura had happened a long time ago. She happened the first they met and since then she had been locked inside a tiny box in Jane's heart, but with all the recent events Maura was struggling really hard to get out of that box and was making the detective lose all control. And to Jane Rizzoli there was nothing worse than losing control.

"I figured. I meant what happened in the morning."

"She didn't know that I was talking about her. So I took the opportunity to taste the waters. See if I could withdraw something from her, you know?"

Korsak look at her surprised. Maybe this meant that Jane was willing to fight for her happiness and will be finally able to see that the doctor feels just the same as her and finally they would stop with this stupid blind game and be together for the sake of everyone. He was absolutely sure that for Jane there was no happiness without Maura and the same worked for the doctor.

"Could you?"

Jane thought for a second. She didn't know if the balance after that conversation was more good than bad. "I'm not sure."

"How come?" Korsak asked intrigued.

"I don't know Vince. I don't know if she was sad because I didn't tell her that I was in love with someone or if she was sad because it was someone else or she was upset because apparently I'm a lesbian."

"And what are you going to do now?

Jane sighed. "I don't know Vince, I really don't know."

* * *

><p>Maura was now sitting on the couch of her living room tucked with a blanket and a glass of wine in her hand repassing the day's events and repeating in her head the conversation she'd had with Jane on the break room. And she tried to remember it all but somehow the only part that keep repeating itself in her head was precisely the part that she tried to forget. The words from which she ran away.<p>

"_If is all so fine as you said then why are you crying?" _

"_Because is just nice. Hear that you feel so much for someone. It's nice. I just wish.." _

"_What? What do you wish?" _

"I just wish it was me." Maura whispered sobbing. And even though her voice was low enough for just her to hear, those words seemed to echo in the empty room, getting back to her ears over and over again heavier and louder every single time.

* * *

><p><strong>AN 2:** **Let me know what you think :)**


	5. Chapter 5

**Say Anything**

**Chapter 5**

**Disclaimer: Jane and Maura don't belong to me. I don't own anything. **

**A/N:**** Hello! First of all I want to thank all of you who started following this story after the last chapter. I love that you like it. And a special thanks to all who took the time to leave a review, they all made me smile so thank you for that. I'm sorry if this took too long, I don't have excuses. But I'm already halfway through chapter six so the next update shouldn't take too long. Also, if you had some suggestions to this I'm open to listen as long as you do it in a respectful way. Anyway, I leave you this and I hope you enjoy it :)**

_._

* * *

><p>That night was one -if not the most- longest night that Maura could remember. She passed the hours trying to decipher what was the best course of actions for her, for Jane and their relationship. She needed a way, an exit to get out of this horrible situation without much damage to her feelings.<p>

She was used to being alone. She spent most of her life alone and she suffered the consequences for it. But now she'd let people in, she let Jane in and penetrate every empty space of her heart and now -unconsciously- she was crushing it from inside with the force of a hurricane.. But that suited her well, there wasn't a better word for describe Jane's arrival to her life. She was a hurricane.

The first hours of the night, Maura's conflicts lay on the uncertain of what hurt her most: being alone without feeling anything for anyone or let people in and allow all this feelings to embrace her.

But at the end she figured that -even if this hurt her- she didn't regret it. And now she was used to the warm that all these people brought to her life and she wouldn't change these last few years for the world.

It was this same family and friends the ones who made her realized that she was important, she mattered. And she had learned to love herself as a person and as a woman.

That last realization was what made her decide that she should stay away from Jane a little while to try to figure out what she was going to do. She needed to decide if was time to move on and accept that they will never be together or if all this was really worth all the risks and their friendship.

Until then, no Jane. That was sure.

* * *

><p>The next day Maura found out that even though he purpose of trying to avoid the detective was clear, do it was a lot harder than she thought. They inevitably found each other everywhere and Maura had to come up with an excuse every single time to run away without being too obvious. And she succeeded. They didn't have a case that day so that meant no crime scene and no morgue visits because Jane was supposed to be working on her paperwork. That night, when Jane suggest take out and a movie, Maura declined saying that she was tired and just wanted to go home and sleep. Easy way out.<p>

The next two days weren't much different from the first one. And Maura thought that her purpose was going well, but the truth was that Jane had realized that something was wrong since day one. It wasn't common for Maura to decline a movie or a late dinner, but the detective let her be, she would find out what was going on anyway.

The thing is that patience wasn't really Jane's strength and she tried to ask Maura very subtlety what was going on but every time they were somehow interrupted or the doctor avoided the question.

But by the fourth day, when she texted Maura at lunch time to see if they were going out to eat and the doctor declined again saying that she was busy, Jane decided that it was enough.

Without other thought and really annoyed she stood up and went to the morgue. This was ending now.

She stormed into the morgue only to find it empty. So unless Maura was doing some paperwork -which she doubt- the doctor wasn't as busy as she had said.

Jane knocked at the closed door of Maura's office and step inside without waiting an answer from the other side and what she saw confirmed her suspicions. Maura was doing shoe shopping.

"Why are you avoiding me?" Jane asked even angrier than before to a very shocked Maura.

This was the confrontation that the doctor was trying to avoid and as long as she could keep doing it, the better would be.

She recovered quickly from her stunned state and looked at the detective with a serious expression. "Hello Jane."

"Hi." Jane had realized that she'd been rude and she sighed as she said so, but then continued with her angry tone,

"Why are you avoiding me?"

"You think that the way you stormed in here slamming doors and demanding answers looks well?" Maura tried to keep her tone neutral, she knew that she was dilating this and that would only make the detective angrier

Jane crossed her arms and looked hard at her friend. "I shouldn't have to do that if you weren't avoiding me."

"That sounds a lot like a guess."

"Then answer my question!" Jane was getting a little more frustrated with every exchange of words. Apparently, Maura had a special ability to get under her skin.

The doctor looked at her and pretended to think for a second. "What question?" She blinked and gaze at the brunette with the most innocent expression she could muster trying to play dumb. She was expecting a report from Susie so -hopefully- they would be interrupted soon.

Jane stomped her foot like a five years old. "Maura!"

"Jane."

"Stop! Can you answer the damn question?" She was getting frustrated and the doctor knew that she couldn't keep dilating this if she didn't want an even angrier Jane yelling for the all building to listen.

Maura sighed. "I'm not avoiding you."

"Yeah," Jane puffed, "You see, you are not wearing the scarf now, so I can actually see the hives on your neck"

Out of reflex, Maura immediately put her hand to her neck trying to block it from Jane's view.

Jane gaze at her and raised an eyebrow. "Are you going to tell me the truth now?"

"I don't know what you are talking about." Maura said nonchalantly.

Jane was giving up; she felt that coming here was a real waste of time. Whatever was wrong with the doctor, she wasn't ready to tell her but Jane wasn't leaving the morgue without at least letting Maura know her piece of mind.

She sighed putting her hands on the desk in front of Maura and leaned in to speak closer the doctor, her voice more low and raspy than ever.

"You know what bothers me, Maura?" She asked to her stunned friend. "These last couple of months every time that something happens to you I have to almost beg you for you to tell me. I know that I should let you come and talk to me when you want to but I can't do that because whatever is going on with you is affecting our friendship. I don't get why you are hiding things from me and i don't know what it is you pretend to do but whatever it is I hope you decide soon, because I really don't like this situation." She stopped and grabbed Maura's hand to continue in a much softer voice, "We didn't used to be like this, honey. I just want to know what's going on."

Maura just looked at her, fighting with herself to not begin to cry. This was hurting Jane as much as it was hurting her, but she couldn't keep going like before because that would destroy them. So she decided that she had to keep going with her original plan until she decided if she wanted to put everything in line for her happiness or if she wanted to stay in this safe place. But she had to do it more subtly because hurting Jane was the last thing she could do.

"I'm really sorry. I guess I didn't realize what I was doing. It just… Happened."

"Happened? It just happened?" Jane looked at her with her mouth hanging open; she couldn't believe the words that had just let the doctor's mouth. "Are you kidding me?"

Maura kept her voice calm, she herself didn't understand from where all this calmness was coming from.

"I don't know what else I can tell you. I'm not even sure how we get to this so I can't give you any other answer. And I'm sorry if it's not what you were expecting."

"Maura-"

Just then there was a knock at the door.

"You have to be fucking kidding me" Jane whispered frustrated.

"Come in!" Maura said as Susie's head appear in the doorway.

"Doctor Isles I got the results for-" She trailed off at the death glare that Jane was giving her.

Jane turned to Maura, "How come every time we try to talk someone has to interrupt us?!"

"I'm sorry. I'll leave you two alone." Susie said as she took a step back.

"Yes." "No." Said Maura and Jane at the same time.

The detective -surprised- turned to look at her friend. "Maura-"

The blonde ignored her and looked directly to Susie. "Detective Rizzoli was just leaving."

"No I wasn't!"

"Yes, Jane. You are." Maura said firmly but with pleading eyes.

Jane turned to look at Susie again, left her intimidating tone aside and spoke softly, "can you give us just a minute, please?"

And the senior criminalistic nod at her and turned to leave but her boss' voice stopped her. "Susie-"

"Maur I promise it would be just a minute." Jane interrupted her.

And the doctor gazed at those pleading brown eyes and found herself incapable of saying no. She looked at Susie again and nodded, indicating for her to leave.

When the door closed, Jane walked by the desk and took Maura's hand to make her stand up.

"Honey, I need you to understand that I'm not doing this to bother you. I just want to know if you fine. If_ we_ are fine."

A couple of eternal seconds passed before Maura answered. She stole a couple of glances at the detective lips before whispering, "We are fine."

Jane smiled at her and Maura felt all the butterflies inside her started to move at the sight of those dimples.

"We are?" Jane asked, still unsure.

And Maura just nodded, she felt incapable of doing more than that.

"Promise?"

"Yes, I promise." She whispered again with a little smile of her own.

Jane looked at her for a moment before turning to leave.

"Maur," she said as she turned around in the doorway, only go find out that the doctor hadn't take her eyes away from her. The words she wanted so hard to say were at the tip of her tongue but there was a knot inside of herself preventing her from saying them. She cleared her throat and smiled at the expectant doctor. "Thank you" she said, which light up one of those big smiles in the doctor's face that she loved so much. "I'll see you later," she said finally and then disappeared on the hallway.

* * *

><p>Jane wasn't ready to go back to work just yet and -as long as Korsak or dispatch didn't called her- she wasn't really in a hurry, so she went to the café. Maybe a talk with her mother about random stuff would help to get Maura out of her head.<p>

Well, no. But she could always try.

When she came in, her mother was busy attending some tables so she just ordered a coffee and sat at an empty table on the back.

She started to think of what just happened with Maura and what they had said. She went through her own words over and over again to see if she'd said everything good, nothing too compromising. But when she started doing it, she realized something different than that, something strange, something that hasn't happened before with anyone and started wondering if she had been always this way with Maura or it was a recent thing due to all the feelings that she was allowing herself to feel.

She was immersed in that thought when a hand on her shoulder and a throat clearing of a hoarsely voice get her out of them, changing her attention the man that had just taken a seat in front of her.

"Daydreaming much?" He raised his hand at Angela to order a coffee.

Jane sighed. "No, not this time. I was just.. thinking."

"Uh that's new," he said mocking her. "What were you thinking about?"

"Me."

He looked at her with big eyes and a bigger smile on his face. "Oh that's new too!"

"Korsak." She said in a plain tone.

"What? Were you thinking about me too?" The sergeant asked playfully.

"You wish." They shared a chuckle at the ridiculous conversation.

When their chuckles subsided she offered an elaboration of the topic, "I just talked to Maura and I was just sitting here going through our conversation and suddenly realized that a lot of the things I said didn't sound like me.. at all."

Korsak looked at her with a curious expression. "What do you mean?"

She leaned on the table to speak closer to the sergeant and that way prevent all the ears around them heard what she was going to say. "I sounded so.. patient and caring and.. sweet and cheesy."

The older detective laughed. "You just realized that?" She nodded and he laughed again.

"What are you laughing about?" She asked serious.

"It's just funny. Patient and caring is how you always act around Maura."

"No, it's not." Jane said obstinate.

"Yes, it is. You just hadn't noticed before because it's how you've always been around her."

She thought for a minute and she actually couldn't remember any time when she hasn't been that way with the doctor, but she wasn't going to admit that to the old man. "Okay, maybe. Let's pretend you are right, but what about sweet and cheesy? I've never been sweet with her. I've never been that way with anyone, ever."

"Well -as far as I've experienced- you can be very sweet when you want to."

"I never want to." Jane leaning back in her chair..

He raised a finger. "Except with Maura."

"But that's the thing!" They were finally getting to some point. "I don't want to either. It's just.. natural, I think. If that make sense."

Korsak smiled and took her hand. "It makes perfect sense. It's called being in love."

She retracted her hand and groaned. "Please don't start this again."

"Oh come on!" Korsak answered as he leaned back in his chair too. "We were talking fine, why you had to ruin this sweet moment?"

Jane looked at him impassive and crossed her arms again.

Korsak give up. "Okay, I know that you really don't like the topic and you hate to talk about your feeling and all that stuff. You've made it pretty clear."

"Thank you" She said, uncrossing her arms and leaning again on the table.

"But you already admit to me that you love her, you don't have to keep this façade in front of me."

Just in that moment, Angela approached them with the cup of coffee for Vince and luckily she didn't stay to talk due to the amount of costumers that were waiting for her, but the interruption she made was a well-timed silence moment for the detectives.

When Angela left, Korsak saw the lost expression on the younger detective's face and allowed the silence remain for a little while, allowing her a moment to think.

Just a couple of minutes had passed before Jane sighed and refocused her gaze on Korsak again. "I guess you are right," she begun, "I guess this is sweetness is part of what they called being in love. I guess that think about her all day, wanting to hug her all day, wanting to laugh with her all day, dreaming with the day I could kiss her.." she trailed off.

Korsak looked at her and couldn't get the smile out of his face. He had known Jane for years and he always wished her the best and right now he knew that the best was next to a certain medical examiner. He'd never heard Jane talk that way about anyone and was really happy that the detective was allowing herself to felt this way.

Jane chuckled. "I guess that it finally came that part of my life." Then she actually laughed and that made the older detective laugh as well. "I just feel so cheesy, so.. not me, but at the same time I feel so happy."

"And I'm happy for you." Korsak said, proud.

A comfortable silence passed between them again, both of them letting the moment sink in, enjoying the confidence and honestly.

"You think you'll tell her someday?" Korsak broke the silence and asked serious.

Jane sighed for the hundredth time since she sat in this chair. "When you asked me that the other day and I told you that I didn't know it wasn't because I just wanted you to drop the topic, it was because I really didn't know. I still don't. I know that she's worth everything and I love her enough to assume the consequences, but I'm still afraid of those consequences, you know?"

He cleared his throat and wait for Jane to look at him and make sure she was listening. "When I divorced my first wife," he begun, "it was complicated because we still love each other very much but we just didn't work well together so we decided that a separation was the best for both. And the day we signed the papers it was really hard because -like I said- the feeling were still there. And then, when we were saying our goodbyes she looked at me and told me '_You know what's the thing about broken hearts? They can only really break once, the rest are just scratches'_. And I thought that it was actually true and very smart of her to think that way.. of course I found out later that it's a quote from a book and not actually something she thought." They both chuckled before the old man continue, "the point is, if this thing between you two work -as we know it will- it'll be awesome and if it doesn't work it will hurt you just once. I think that –as you said- is worth the risk."

"It's not my heart that I'm worried about. It's hers. I might complicate her feelings and maybe she won't look at me or trust me the same way again. I really don't want to hurt you. If I do, this will be the biggest mistake of my life."

"No." Korsak said firmly, "The biggest mistake that you could make is being afraid of made a mistake."

"Is that from a book too?" Jane asked smiling trying to lighten the mood.

"You are missing the point." Tried unsuccessfully, obviously.

"I know. The more I think about it, the more I know that I have to tell her, so I think that I'm gonna do it. I'll tell her, but if I do it, it has to be in the right time."

"There's not such a thing as right time!"

"There is. I can't scare her off. And I need this for this to work. I'm of that few people that still think that an 'I love you' it's not anything, so it has to be done right."

Korsak gazed at her. "I'm really proud of you."

She smiled before rolling her eyes. "Thank you."

If she was honest with herself, Jane had to admit that she actually enjoy these moments with Korsak. Well, not enough to have them every day, but when they happened they were good. She admired his experience. He had gone through a lot sentimentally and he was allowing her to learn how to avoid some mistakes. And besides, he was the only person she could talk about the topic. She couldn't talk with her best friend for obvious reasons, she couldn't talk to her brother because that would be just weird and she couldn't talk with her mother because at their first conversation she would probably be asking who would carry the babies, so Korsak was her best shot and she was fine with it. Sometimes he put too much pressure on her but if it wasn't for him -and that stupid song on the radio- she wouldn't be this happy with herself now. Of course, she could be happier but it couldn't be now. It requires a little patience and work. She had to prepare the road. But of one thing she was sure: Maura was the love of her life and she was going to fight for it.

"Come on now, Romeo." Korsak stood up and extended his hand for her to take. "Let's go back to work if we don't want our asses on Cavanaugh's office."

Jane groaned and took his hand. "Don't call me Romeo."

Korsak chuckled. "I think that the singer of the song we listened the other day would be more appropriate, but I had no idea what his name is."

"Anderson East." She whispered, making Korsak stop in his tracks to look at her.

"Oh my god," he said blinking.

"What?"

"You searched for the song." Korsak smiled and Jane snorted.

"I have no idea what are you talking about." She started to walk out of the cafe.

"No wait, this is perfect." Korsak continue, playfully. "That's how you should tell her. You put that song on Maura's sound system in her house and waited for her all dressed up with dinner and candles. She will fall at your feet." He said dramatically putting his hand on his forehead.

"See? That's why none of your marriages worked." Jane remarked as she pressed the up arrow waiting for the elevator.

"Ohh!" He said faking pain and grabbing his abdomen, "that was low even for you."

She chuckled. "Shut up."

When the elevator arrived he put his hand on the door to prevent it from closing and signaled for her to go in, "Come on, Miss East."

Jane rolled her eyes before stepping in. Korsak followed her and the elevator closed it doors. Neither of them said anything else, even though Korsak was still trying to suppress a laugh.

Jane looked at him out the corner of her eye. "If you don't breathe now you're gonna suffocate."

And Korsak burst laughing.

She rolled her eyes. "I think I'll stick with Romeo."

* * *

><p><strong>AN 2:** **Let me know what you think :)**


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